The first furrow is not a furrow

on BLOG, Career Coaching, Coaching, success 13 Mag, 2016

Il primo solco non è solco

The wise and concrete peasant culture produced the saying "the first furrow is not a furrow": what is enacted for the first time is necessarily flawed for lack of practice, but, by repeating the action, you learn to "straighten out" the way and to excel.

Continuing this metaphor, I can say that my business as a career coach is all about furrow, and most precisely about the imperfect ones. Generally, the coachees come to me to ask for support and guide towards a drastic change in their careers and professional lives and are always torn between resistance to change and a desire/need of fulfilment. This is because often the first furrow (i.e. the result of decisions made by us or by others at thirteen, eighteen, twenty-three years) is clearly not a furrow.

But the career coach's task is not so simple: if the proverb is true, it's also true that we are all more or less influenced by the cliché of winners, who persist with determination and never drop out or capitulate. And so, almost automatically, we keep walking for years on paths, which are blatantly wrong or not suitable for us.

This cliché is likely to be born by looking stubborn people, who, with humble persistency, reached the success. The external viewer associated their grit and blind insistence to the achieved result, without considering other key elements, like talent, alignment with core values and excellent clarity of objectives. To my nature, I refuse the dogma of success as a simple, direct result of determination and persistence: how much damage, in fact, these two behaviours caused! How many nervous breakdowns, depressions, collapses, how many unhappy lives, how many dichotomies, how many escapes in dreams, fantasies, recriminations, regrets, "if I", "if they", "if I were" ...

Today we live in a dynamic era, with rapid evolution of the individual and collective consciences, which, rather than to superheroes, belongs to individuals who can and want to understand themselves, being able to throw in the towel and abandon a path that does not lead the necessary and deserved well-being, balance, centering and significance. This is the true success, generating energy, positivity and quality of life for ourselves and for the people with whom we interact.

To straighten the furrow, it takes hard work and dedication and, at the same time, the ability to read ourselves, the lucidity to understand when the task is becoming too burdensome and the courage to begin the change. Successful people know how to do all four things.

What it is not working?

If your furrow was straight, what it would look like? Can you imagine it in detail?

What three actions you can start today to get closer to this vision?






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